Broken

Tonight, a ceramic basket I had sitting on the coffee table broke. It was pretty. I was planning on getting some fake ivy to put in it once we paid off our credit cards. I loved that basket. 

But now it's broken. It can't be fixed at all. I sat staring at the pieces and just thought to myself, 'this is what I feel like right now. 

BROKEN

I make messes. I am always tired and so I sleep a lot. I'm irritating my husband. I can't get oregnant without help. So, I cleaned up the pieces and shuffled upstairs to shower and lay down. I felt like I couldn't cry, not even one tear. But after I laid down, the tears began to flow and my emotions let loose like a flood. I cried because I feel this way almost every single day. I feel like I'm not good enough. Not as a wife and not as a woman. My heart feels like my ceramic basket. Just a broken mess. 

I'm done crying now. I feel like I'm gonna crash for the night. Maybe, tomorrow I won't feel so bad. Just maybe.